this is what you shall do:
Friday, May 26, 2006|
May is Traffice Safety Month
1. Do you yield when a blind pedestrian is crossing the road? Well of course. I stop and I stare. And I marvel at the fact that the guy is getting around in this crazy world. Then I ignore the other homeless guy begging at the corner.
2. Who has the right of way when four cars approach a four-way stop at the same time?? The bigges truck or wait, let me remember my training - the Super collosal oil tanker always has the right of way. Either that or the one with the most guns.
3. What are the important safety tips to remember when backing your car? Seat belt on. Coffee cup stored and most importantly, garage door - open. That is basically my initial backing check list.
4. What problems would you face if you were arrested for drunk driving? I have a bad time sleeping if my bed isn't just right. Sure, that would be the issue - getting decent night's sleep in the drunk tank. Oh, yeah, and add to that a decent cup of coffee. As you know, I am picky about my coffee. Hard to sleep of a drunk without some coffee. At least that is what I have learned from the movies.
5. What is the difference between a flashing red traffic light and a flashing yellow traffic light? One is listening to ABBA.
Friday, May 19, 2006|
1. Do you squeeze the toothpase tube or roll it? What's the advantage of your method? Squeeze. Well technically it is like a roll. I have a thingy, sort of a toothpaste squeege that does the squeeze roll thing for me and also serves as a convienient toothpaste hanger upper.
2. How many siblings do you have? What's your birth order? 1 sibling, Julie. Oldest. Three step siblings. Second oldest in that group.
3. What is something you won? How did you win it? In high school I won a coveted Voice of America trophy from the VFW for a speech on patriotism that I presented. I was such a right wing patriot in my younger days.
4. What is one of your nicknames? What do you prefer to be called? Wah. R-dub. Rdubya. I think I like R-dub, although I rarely refer to myself by a nickname. I hate being referred to by my last name. Sounds all Army like or "Coach" like and I am hardly a jock.
5. What's something your parents used to say to you as a child that you promised yourself you'd never say - but now you catch yourself saying it? Slow down! Do you have to drive so fast!
Friday, May 12, 2006
"Even At 29 . . .
He ain't hit rock bottom yet." Bush polls hit 29%
1. If 100 people your age were chosen at random, how many do you think you'd find having a more satisfying life than yours? Oh, that is tough. I have no life. I work, I peck around on my computer, I hang out with some great friends each weekend, but I don't have kids, a wife or family, I don't travel a lot, I don't own a house with a lawn I pick over. Lately I have been finding something missing in my life, but I can't put a finger on it. I have never been a real "couple" person, needing a life partner or family to make me happy, but perhaps there is more out there - that said I think I could find a good chunk of 100 right now living a more satisfying life, as I am in a rut.
2. Do you ever spit or pick your nose in public. What about cleaning your teeth with a toothpick. Oh, you folks, alas, all the know the answer to that one - I am a picker. A nose picker. I am sorry. I find it no worse or gross than finger nail biting - but society does, so there you have it. I am sorry.
3. If you knew a thermonuclear holocaust would occur in precisely 20 years and no one would survive it, how would you change your present life? More time at the ranch. More travel to see the world. Less time on the couch.
4. If you wanted to look very sexy, how would you dress. Thongs. Leather thongs with lots of fringe. I am going to where one to work today. Get ready for the new Roy!
5. If there were a public execution on television, would you watch it.? Absolutely. I am against the death penalty and I think the rest of the nation would be as well, if they had to experience it in person. Put the prisoner on the stage, hit the lights, run tape and present the gruesome death in high def television. The death penalty would go away very soon afterwards.
Friday, May 05, 2006|
1. How do you picture your funeral? Is it important to have people on hand to mourn you? Huge mourning. We may need to rent the National Cathedral. I think I will start getting together an appropriate media team to coordinate the televised lines as I lay in state. Speechifyin', Mommas cryin'. That is what I foresee.
2. Is there anything anyone could have/should have told you that would have made your first sexual experience more rewarding? It is not a race. The goal isn't to perform sex as if it were a bank heist. Quick in. Blow the safe then a quick getaway.
3. Can you go to the restroom in front of another person? Usually. Unless I am incredibly farty. Then I will pee in the stall not the urinal so I can really let a corker go. Otherwise just come on over and I will pee for you anytime. Call first so I can get my bladder really full. I would like to be nice host and if you can for pee, then I think I am obligated to really let go with some, so a polite call in advance would really be in your interest.
4. How do you react when people sing Happy Birthday to you in a restaurant? Generally badly. Badly and embarrased. However a few years back I was accidentally serandaded by some songstress at a birthday celebration at La Chuga's in North Denver. It was such a bad performance that looking back, it was very funny. She didn't sing Happy Birthday but I don't recall the song. (Any help out there on that?)
5. If you had to spend a season in a small but fully provisioned Antarctic shelter with one other person, whom would you like to have with you? Well, this is where I get an edge of folks. See, I have no spouse or cherished love ones that I am contractually obligated to live with. So I can wipe away the sentiment. I won't have to say: "My wife, because together we can tackle the world - with our love." That leaves me with a realistic view. And since the Antarctic is a terrible mistress, full of danger, weather and challenges, I need someone who knows what they are doing - because I don't. I would choose Kevin's pal Arne. I disagree politically with just about everything about him, but he could kill a seal and keep the fire burning - all important points.